


Give Me a Reason to Be.

by Mr_Dadamy_Blake



Series: But Only For Tonight [1]
Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Gen, Jack Zimmermann's past, M/M, Overdosing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-24
Updated: 2016-05-24
Packaged: 2018-06-10 12:27:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6956458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mr_Dadamy_Blake/pseuds/Mr_Dadamy_Blake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when your soulmate is emotionally constipated and you're just an asshole?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Give Me a Reason to Be.

**Author's Note:**

> The title is a lyric from Tonight You're Perfect by New Politics, because I'm a sap and I couldn't actually think of a title for this mess. Soulmate AU where you have your soulmates name written on some part of your body. This is my first time writing these characters so bear with me. I also haven't written anything in forever so this is me coming out of my hidey hole with content.  
> Did I edit this? No. So please if I have any typos tell me I don't bite. Constructive criticism is always welcome.  
> Did I spend my entire morning writing this? Yes.  
> Do you care? Probably Not.  
> Read&Enjoy!!

Kent Parson walked into the ice rink for the very first time and all he sees is a boy with ice blue eyes that look sadder than a kicked puppy. He doesn't know his name yet, hasn't seen the jersey to know or talked to him. But he felt the pull of this other boy and when they're introduced it's like the name on his lower back is burning. It's as if he's seeing color for the first time. 

And Kent’s favorite color is blue. 

They don't talk much after that. Jack Zimmermann is serious, he's a leader and Kent wants to follow but he doesn't know how. He hasn't told him about the name on his lower back. Doesn't want to. 

_ “What if it isn't him, mom? What if it is him and he has someone else's name?” _

_ “If it isn't him than you keep looking honey, there are way too many Jacks out there. And if it is him, he'll have your name honey. Fate doesn't make mistakes.” _

_ “I love you mom. Talk later?” _

_ “Love you too, Kenny. Say hi to Jack for me.” _

“My mom says hi.” Kent blurts out. It's the first time he sees Jack smile and his stomach does a backflip into his throat. He felt stupid. 

“Mine does too.” Jack left for the rink. Just like that, leaving Kent in his dust. He’ll never know if Jack was being honest or chirping him that day. He doesn't care. He'll never see that smile again, he  _ does _ care. 

That day after practice Jack invited Kent to his house. Kent accepted. He became addicted to Jack’s presence, after deliberating for a while he comes to the conclusion of “ _ who wouldn't be?”  _  Jack laughed at something he said, he can't remember what it was that was so funny. But he remembered the way Jack’s entire frame shook with him, how his sad eyes stopped looking so sad, how he smiled like he hasn't smiled in years, or laughed that hard, or  _ lived _ . It makes Kent sad, that for as much as he tried. He never got Jack to laugh like that again. 

And he wondered,  _ is he really the one? _

_ - _

_ “Momma, what good is a soulmate if I can't… If I…”  _ he didn't sob that day. As much as he tried he couldn't cry. Kent felt empty, like the air inside of him had escaped, he couldn't remember what breathing was and he could feel the tears in the back of his eyes, waiting, patient. He didn't cry that day. He couldn't afford it. 

_ “Kent, honey, you're his soulmate… Not his savior.”  _

_ “But what good is that if he dies? What good is that if I… I could have done something. Anything. I could have told someone. It's my fault. Mom it's my fault isn't it?”  _

_ “No, honey it isn't.”  _

He knows someone overheard him talking with his mom that day. It was the headline for three days.  _ Kent Parson Guilty of Overdose?  _ He had never seen Bad Bob so livid at a reporter before. On his behalf, while his son lied in a hospital bed. While they tried to remove Kent from his side but only managed to get a bruised rib or a black eye. He doesn't know. Doesn't care. 

He never told Jack. Never got the chance. Never wanted to tell him that he almost lost his spot on the Aces to stay with Jack.  _ Because they were soulmates.  _ That had to count for something right? 

-

Jack never answered his calls. Kent couldn't blame him. Who wants to stare at their past in the eyes? But it hurt. 

“ _ How are you Jack? Please just tell me that. How are you?”   _ He never gets an answer. He convinced himself it was because Jack never learned how to check his voicemails. 

Kent smiled. Remembering the look on Jack's face the first time he owned a smartphone. It was so precious. Kent probably still had the picture he snapped on his laptop. 

-

Kent finds a dirty blue eyed cat under the dumpster. He drops his trash and leaves. Later he goes back with water and food. He leaves it close by and backs away. He watches as the cat walks up to it. Kent swears to this day that Kit glared at him while she ate anyway because she was starved. 

It took him a week to get the cat to trust him enough to get close while it was eating. It took him another for it to let him touch it. All in all it took a month to get Kit inside his apartment, cleaned and fed and ready for a trip to the vet. Kit didn't let him close for two weeks after the vet appointment. 

Kent is on his couch, gently petting Kit. Running his fingers through her uneven fur. She looks at him with her blue eyes. 

“Will you be my soulmate Kit?” The cat purrs at him and he pretends that's a yes. 

Blue is  _ still  _ his favorite color. 

-

Going to the frat party in hopes of finding Jack was probably a worse idea than getting kit a leash. He still had scars.

Kent got what he wanted. But once he had it he didn't know what to do with it. Jack pulled him away to talk. 

“What are you doing here?”

“After a couple years of you not calling back I thought I'd take it into my own hands and see if my soulmate is ok.” He didn't want it to sound bitter. He didn't want to hurt Jack. Not again. But he did sound bitter and Jack did flinch away from him. “One call Jack. All it took was one call. I'd leave you alone, I'd back off. I guess it's my fault for not getting the hint the first hundred times huh?” 

“Kenny,” Jack started but he didn't know how to finish. That seemed to always be the problem. Kent hated it, hated himself. But this was his soulmate. 

They kiss. For all the wrong reasons and Kent pulled away. Knowing it wasn't fair for him. For Jack. He didn't know how they start fighting. All he knew is that it was probably his own fault. That seemed to be his job. His official title shouldn't be Captain of the Aces. It should be fucker upper. Because that seemed to be the only thing he knew how to do. 

He didn't know what he said the second it was out of his mouth. All he knew was that when he opened the door to leave there was a blond man on the ground. He stared at Kent. 

And he knew like that, that he should probably hate the kid looking at him like he shattered all his dreams. He didn't know  _ why _ just that he should. But Kent didn't because the boy turned to look at Jack and there was  _ worry _ written all over him. He couldn't hate someone who loved Jack. So he walked away. It was all he could do. 

“ _ Momma what do I do when my soulmate doesn't love me back?”  _

_ “Sometimes honey, soulmates are not synonymous of lovers.”  _

_ “But what if I love him like that, and he doesn't.”  _

_ “Then you'll have to move on, honey. He still needs you, he still loves you. Losing a soulmate is like losing a limb. You haven't lost him yet. Don't lose him.” _

_ - _

When Kent turned off the TV the last thing he saw was Jack and a small blond man with big warm brown eyes. Jack loved him, in a way he could never have loved Kent. He yelled it to the world in a way he never wanted to with Kent. He wanted to hate them. He wanted to hate Jack for being unable to love  _ him  _ like he did that man. But he couldn't. He couldn't hate someone that made Jack smile like that. So soft and warm and  _ happy.  _

“ _ Momma, what do I do? I want to hate him. I can't hate him.”  _

_ “Then love him, for loving Jack. And doing what you couldn't to make him happy. Be happy for them. Talk to Jack.”  _

_ “But I always mess it up.”  _

_ “Have you apologized? How long has it been? You miss him. He misses you too. I know he does.”  _

_ “I love you, talk later?” _

_ “Always, I love you too, Kenny.”  _

_ - _

Reporters tried to get his statement. Tried to get Kent to say negative things about Jack and his man. To act like the jealous ex. But he wasn't Jack's ex. He was his soulmate. and just because Jack didn't love him, didn't mean he didn't love Jack. So he brawls with the reporter that throws slurs around like they're candy. 

“Fuck man, he's my soulmate. And I love him. And if Bittle makes him happy, then fuck. Who am I to interfere? I just want him to be happy, he deserves to be happy.”

The reporter takes his statement while Kent is cupping his broken nose and leaning his head back trying to stop the bleeding. The PR department were going to have an aneurism but he didn't care. 

Later that day he ignored a call from Jack. If he was going to remove himself completely from his life and let him be happy, then he was going to do it right. 

His mother was right. It did feel like losing a limb. 

He read an article that rumored that Bittle didn't have a soulmate. It was a nasty piece. So he stopped reading the news all together. 

-

His phone rang. He checked it only to read  _ Unknown.  _ He answered just in case. 

“Hello?”

_ “Parson?”  _ Kent hung up. Bittle. Kit looked at him like she knew the true disappointment he was. he huffed at her and walked away. He needed a life long nap. 

“ _ Momma, I don't know how to speak to him. I'm just going to hurt him again.”  _

_ “Listen to your mother, Kent Parson. You go talk to that boys right this instant.”  _

_ “Mom, I don't think I can.”  _

_ “Right now.”  _

_ “...” _

_ “I love you Kent. Go talk to that boy.”  _

_ “I love you too mom.”  _

_ - _

Kent opened his door only to shut it again. He didn't lock it, but he's pretty sure it hit Jack on the nose. 

“Go away!” 

“Not until we talk.” Kent felt a grim sense of satisfaction when Jack walked in with his hand rubbing his big nose. He glared at Kent and then at Kit. Jack dodged a swipe from Kit and went over to sit on Kent’s couch like he owned it or something. “why are you avoiding me?”

“Doesn't feel great, huh, when the person that's supposed to be there for you never takes your calls.” Kent mumbled

“Kent…” Jack looked constipated but that was how Jack looked most of the time with Kent. 

“No it's fine I get it. I've been getting it for the past couple years. Took me long enough, huh?” 

“Kent…” 

“Why are you here Jack?” 

“What you said that day.” There were things said, there were so many days. Yet Kent knew exactly which one. “I want you to be happy too.” 

They sat in silence for over an hour. Kent absentmindedly running his fingers through kit’s uneven fur. She mewled at him stretching out until her hind legs touched Jack’s thigh and her head was on Kent’s lap. That couldn’t possibly be comfortable but he let her be. She stared at him, expectantly. As if she knew what had to happen next. 

“I’m… I’m sorry. About everything. I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too. Can we, start over?” 

“Yeah, yeah I’d like that.” Kent nodded keeping his eyes on Kit. Knowing that if he looked up he was in trouble. His favorite color was still blue, it would never change. He knew that. But he didn’t care. 

_ “Momma?” _

_ “Yeah Kenny?” _

_ “Jack says hi.”  _

_ “Tell him I say hello right back, I love you.”  _

_ “I love you too mom. He wants me to meet Eric, his boyfriend.”  _

_ “Is that good? Are you ok?”  _

_ “I… I think I am. Love you, talk later?” _

_ “Talk later, you’ll tell me all about that boy, ok?”  _

_ “Ok.”  _


End file.
